Peter | Māngere
“First love story? Well, that would be a little bit difficult. So, my love life started very, very early.
When I came to New Zealand, I’d travelled around the world, because I was in the Merchant Navy, and so I’ve already seen the world, but I came to New Zealand and I thought, what a beautiful place – I think I’ll stay here for three years, and then go to Australia, but it never happened. It was such a lovely place I stayed here, and then I met my wife.
When I first met my wife, I met her in a little café, a Chinese café, and I didn’t know her, but she was with a cutter at the farm she worked for, and the friend I was going in there, who was on the ship with me, knew the person she was with, and her, and he waved out to her. Of course, I waved out too and she looked at me, thinking, I don’t know you, but smiled back. We went over and we had a meal together, and we got on fairly well. So, I said, well my ship is going away tonight, would you like to come and see us off? So, they both came down, and saw me off on the ship, when I was going around the Islands. I was in on one of the Island boats from here, and she gave me a wave, and I said, look I’ll be back. So, I got her phone number, and I got back. Well met, I only knew her for about a couple of months, and we were engaged, and within nine months we were married, and it was a relationship which started, I’m 84 now, and I’ve been married for about 57, 58 years. So, it’s a good relationship. With myself, if I find a good, strong friendship, to me that’s love. It’s a loving relationship.
What does love feel like? Well, love is, to me it’s a relationship. It’s a good relationship. It’s like a friend. When you have a good friend, you respect each other’s point of view, but you don’t always agree with them, but it’s a loving affair because you get on with people, and that’s one of my things I found I’ve always been able to get on with people. So, my love affair is with life itself.
I had a very short engagement and married, and settled down, and lived in Auckland, lived in Kaitaia, but Māngere, it’s a really mixed crowd, and it’s very good. All the walkers are nice. We have Asians, Chinese, Malaysians, everyone, and it’s a sort of environment I’m quite used to. You know, travelling around the world, I make friends with everyone.
Look, it’s very hard. I was a Merchant Seaman, you know? We had a wife in every port, don’t forget. No, it’s very awkward. My first love, because it’s during, my first love was when I was very young, living in England and it’s during the war, and we used to live in shelters. You know? Going to the air-raid shelters, so we’re always mixing, or otherwise, we’re in a community shelter, and there it’s like you meet people on a walk or something. As a young fella, I’m not 11 yet, I’m around about nine, 10; I’m meeting young girls, who I end up making friends with, it’s something like a marae. You just mix with all kinds of people, and you’re sleeping in rough situations. So, it wasn’t any true loves, but lots and lots of friendships, and learned to get on with each other and help each other in difficulties.
I spent many years at sea, you see, from the age of 16 to about 21. So, a lot of my life is, I can’t be in a constant relationship. You know? I did have a girlfriend in England, but we weren’t serious. You know? There’s no serious part there, but I’d made a rash decision to come to New Zealand.
I come from England of course, and I was born, I lived there in the war years, of course, the war started when I was five, and it finished when I was 11, so I lived through the Battle of Britain. Bombed out five times over there. I had many sweethearts as a young fella.
Moving away from my love life, because that’s very difficult to describe, I’ll tell you the story of my first being bombed out in England. My mother had bought a stool table, a stool table top, had support with wire meshing around, and we were tired of running to the shelter because there were air-raids all the time. The war is really starting to pick up, so, we used to sleep, the mother and I used to sleep under the table, and my father had died, because he fell off a roof when he was a tiler, so I was just with my mother. We were sound asleep, so used to all the noise, and suddenly there’s a loud voice trying to wake us up. Wake up, wake up, down to the town hall. My mother looked up, there’s dust everywhere. She said, ‘how did you get in here?’ He said, ‘how did I get here?’ He said ‘you’ve got no front of the house left.’ The blast had hit the bottom of the house, and the house, two-storey, fell out to the road. So, we were safe but covered in dust of course, but so used to the noise. That was my experience as a young fella, living through many times. I was bombed out five times in England. Some were just from the shells coming from our fellas, but when it breaks up, they come through your roof, and you’re hemmed up with about 17 little pots around when it rains. You know? Until it gets so bad you have to move to another place.
I’ve lived in Māngere for about 40 years, in Ventura Street, which his a very nice place. Nice neighbours, a stream at the back, which is a little creek. It’s a wonderful place.”