Donna | Lansdowne, Wairarapa

“I’m right into kindness, and caring for other people and all that sort of thing.

My mother died a month ago and we had a lovely, kind time with our family, and the carers who had been looking after her were so kind to us, helping us say goodbye to her in the lockdown was pretty amazing. Very specialist kindness people who made us and Mum have a really good experience. That was probably the most recent. She was an 86 year old, lovely matriarch who dedicated her life to her family. She was a really hard working nurse and a person on her own for most of her life, and we all cared about her a lot, and we were thankful to have her, but she lived longer than she should have, really. She stayed alive in quite a bit of pain, for quite a long time. She was very brave. So, we were happy to say goodbye to her. She had a good life, and has been good to us.

What would I say to her? Just thank you, I’m just very grateful, and sorry for when I was grumpy with her, really.

I think it’s about sharing space, and sharing life with people, and not being judgemental, and just letting them be themselves. As long as everyone is kind. If we were all kind to each other, man wouldn’t it be awesome? I think it’s so crucial just to be forgiving, and allow people to be grumpy or not in their best shape at a certain time, or whatever, and let everyone have their bit of space in their own way, so long as they’re being nice, too. 

I grew up here. I’ve had a great life. I’m a retired nurse, and I raised my family around here. I’m staying reasonably well and healthy and having a good time in my retirement. I’m feeling very privileged and lucky.”