Jace | Waitara, Taranaki

**This story talks about suicide. If you, or someone you know, needs help you can text or free call 1737 at anytime to talk to, or text with, a trained counsellor.  For free support for young people, or people supporting young people, contact Youthline 0800 376 633 or free text 234 **

“I lost my uncle to suicide not too long ago, which was really hard on my whole family, and caused a lot of issues that I just kind of have to put up with. But we make it through as a whole, as long as you have people around you that can support you through it.

The main issue is when my brother passed away, it had a similar appearance to when my uncle did. Same coffin, same cars, same funeral home, and so that just made it really hard on my dad, and it’s pretty much, the second time I’ve ever seen my dad cry. It really sucks to see. 

I’ve been through some pretty hard moments myself, and just seeing the people around me hurt because of it, makes me want to better myself, and so I find ways to express it, rather than doing anything that could affect other people around me, which is what got me into art in the first place.

I’ve been drawing since I was about five. Admittedly it wasn’t the best back then, but it’s something I’ve always had a passion for and never lost. Compared to a few other things that I’ve had a small interest in and given up on, mainly because there’s people that keep telling me that I’m not good enough to. So I just kept continuing with my art, and improving, and what inspires me usually is just, if I have something going on in my head, I’ll usually try and express it through a work of art, since words are hard for me, it’s hard for me to talk about my feelings.

I drew a picture of my cat who passed away last month, because she was pretty much my rock. She was there every time I was feeling upset, and so I drew a picture of her, and it’s one that I show off a lot, because it’s one of the only ones that I’ve done in a realistic manner. Usually it’s just line art, but for her, I wanted to make it a bit special. 

My best piece of advice I could give around that situation is to try and talk about it, or express it somehow so you can get a message across to people that you need help, and so you can get that help that you need. Losing someone close to you to suicide can put everyone in a bad place and there’s people that will check up on you all the time, and you’ll tell them that you’re okay, because you can’t find a way to express how you feel. So, if you can find a way to express it, do it, and get the help that you need.

So, I was born in New Plymouth, and moved to Hamilton for six years, throughout primary school, and came back here because my dad wanted more opportunities for work. I’ve been thinking about either being an art teacher, a tattoo artist or a graphic design artist. There’s a lot of study that goes into it.”