How are you?

Di | Ōtautahi

As her husband’s health has deteriorated, Di (Christchurch) has taken on the role of his carer. This responsibility has also required Di to make sure she takes care of herself. 

“This is quite a tough and challenging time and it’s not always easy. But I make a point of looking after myself so that I can look after others. I had to learn to do that, and I can sometimes be a bit selfish about that. But I actually think I need to do that too.

My husband is twelve years older than I am, and he has several health challenges. One of them is cancer, and he also experiences a bit of cognitive decline. As a result, I find that my time is often spent at home. It’s just part of life, but sometimes it can be pretty tough, especially when he becomes really ill and needs to be hospitalised, which happens quite frequently.

In some ways, though, it’s better now. Our relationship is stronger than it perhaps was before. Things have clearly changed dramatically, but I think he’s more considerate now, and he does appreciate what I do. I know that for sure. Going through these challenges has made me realise how important stable relationships within a marriage are to the rest of the family.”