Eddie | Ōrākei
“My, I was raised like different ways, and I learn from it, heaps of things.
That’s why I’m using it at the moment to raise markets. I raise up different way. When I’m seven years old, I finish school, go to work to help my family, because we were still struggling, and I’ve been working with others, people older than me, 20 years and over, and I’m seven years, eight years, and people are like, wow what are you doing here? Helping my family. I’m supposed to not be there. I’m supposed to be at school and home. I’m born in Sudan, and I grew up in Sudan in Africa.
The way my dad’s grown me up, my dad, he never have education, but he work hard for us, and everything, but he used to beat me up, like an animal, you know? My body bleeding and everything. I used to run away from home. One day I run away from home when I’m 13. I came back when I’m around 16/17 and I said to my dad, you’re not my dad. I said to him, dad you used to beat us like an animal. People with their kids, and they’re happy as, and do good things. I asked my dad one question; did you know my favourite colour? He said, what about colour, what about colour, what even is that asking a question? He doesn’t know. I said, my friend, he knows everything about me. And then I said to my dad, you know if you put your hands on me or one of my friends, or one of my brothers again I will fight you, he started crying, and he say, you grew up now, you’re a man. And since that day until he passed away, he never touched any one of us. He started smiling. He never used to smile to us. He was always serious, angry. But after I talked to him that way, and I told him my experience, he’s become happy man, and he never touched my brothers, and he was happy and lovely man.
When I come to New Zealand and have kids, and I said, the best way to be with my kids, I look to my kids is not like a father. It’s like a friend. That’s what I said to my daughter and my son, put the fingers together and I say to them, hey we’re a team, you know, we are friends, who I am? They say you’re our dad. Who are you? Your kids. No, we’re friends, all right? If I say to you to do something you, you’re allowed to ask me questions, why Dad, why that. I want to be honest, open to me, and I’m open to you. I never lie to you, that’s how friends are, be kind, be honest, if you’re going through trouble, talk to me, I’ll talk to you, if I’m going through trouble I’ll talk to you. That’s the way I learn.
Kids are lucky in New Zealand, the way they grew up, and they look after us. I’m really so sorry for child abuse, because a lot of people, they doing it until now. Even the law is tough too, but they do it under the table. No-one sees, you know, but the kids, they can’t talk, they can’t say anything, because no people around, but I wish every kid around the world has the opportunity to be free, to say whatever he wants, to do whatever he wants, to be who or whatever he wants, not to force.
Life is going to be better, because there’s a new generation, because they’re going to blame us in the future when they grow up, and they say, oh my dad and my mum, you know? And their kids are going to say, my mum and dad. Well, why not break the circle, and be good people and normal, and look after our kids normally, you know? That’s why I want our kids to become, grow up good people in the community and for us and for everyone.”