Trinity | Titirangi / Waiheke Island
“I’ve just recently moved over from Waiheke Island. Waiheke Island is actually my home. I lived there for a long time and have just recently moved out West.
I have a 12 year old and I have a two year old, so there’s a huge gap. So I was at the stage where I was learning about teenagers and what’s cool for teenagers at this stage, and with the technology and their needs for schooling such as iPads and the expense of it all. Plus, I’ve got two girls, so my 12 year old’s coming up to this age where she’s very emotional and sensitive, so I’ve learned to be very careful about the topic, that way that I approach have conversations with her so that she doesn’t shut down.
It’s best to know the kind of mood that she’s in for the day before I actually start asking her questions about everything to get information from her, because it’s important to know as much as you possibly can, and with my two year old, that was a whole new ballgame. I can’t remember really much about my 12 year old when she was two, because so much has happened since then, so it was like having a brand new baby all over again. I’ve learned a lot of patience and tolerance. I’m also 10 years older so I’ve got a lot more patience and tolerance for her.
When Janelle was 12, it was sort of like tough love; you put your children to bed and you let them cry themselves to sleep. With this child I’ve learned that you know, talking calmly and nicely and actually talking to them probably you get a lot further and you know they respond a lot nicer towards you.
I’m a student at Unitec, and I’m studying mental health. So what makes me tick is my children. The reason why I studied mental health is because I want to be informed if my children ever have situations that they can’t deal with in life. When they’ve got options, thinking that there’s only one option, but knowing that they, you know, I want to be able to, you know advise, give them good advice that they would hopefully listen to when they get older. And also when theyraise their own children. I want to be someone that they can talk to, so that, basically my children make me tick.
Personally from my own experience my children make me want to learn more about living the best that you possibly can in the world, because I want to be a good role model to them, and I don’t want them to make the mistakes that I’ve made in my life. So I think that’s the biggest, I think that’s the main thing for me is, is being knowledgeable. So I can help them. I find that constantly talking to them, even if I’m tired and grumpy, it’s really easy to just go and sort of shut down and cook dinner in the kitchen and hide away and do your house cleaning and just hide away from your kids.
It’s like when you kind of have had enough, but I find that you know, just letting them know that you’re grumpy, you know, and then, so that everyone’s sort of on the same page or letting them know that you’re tired having those moments. Those days that are special to know that you’re spending quality family time, you know, on a regular basis, so that you’re always sort of, you know, you’re all on the same sort of motion constantly.
Because there’s so much distrust now in Auckland with people, and everyone seems really isolated now as well, because of technology and I think I don’t know many family days events, because we seem to have a lot of them, but in West Auckland, but those big events that are for families are really, really cool, especially in the small communities actually because it connects the small communities together so people get to know each other.”
